Hmmm. Kids are not always receptive to what we have to say, and what we want them to learn. And neither are we. It can help to wait and consider several things before we jump in:
** Do I need to say something about this right now?
** If so, what do I need to say right now?
** How can I say this in a way that will make it most likely to be heard?
** How can I adjust my expectations to accept the response(or non-response) to my input?
Seems like I need to live through the same lessons over and over before they sink in, if they are going to at all. The lesson that has been rumbling around for me often lately is about my powerlessness. I would often like to believe that I know best. If they would only do "it" my way, everything would be alright. Well, of course, this isn't true. We don't have all the answers. And there is a very good chance that our answer is not exactly what that other person needs. Yes, when children are babies and little ones, we have to make alot of decisions for them. And remember, sometimes we chose wrong. And then once they move into toddlerhood, they want to make at least some of their own choices.
Even with my grown children, my own parents, my siblings and their kids, my partner, I have ideas about what would be best. And everyday, I need to remember to accept the things I cannot change. And work on my own issues, which is the only place where I really have any influence. I have to remember this, and possibly learn this anew, every day.
I just heard a thought tonight that will be helpful for me in the moment, when I am considering giving my input. Or if I am bringing expectations to an interaction:
Let me set aside everything I think I know about ____
so that I may be open to this new experience,
or new idea, or someone else's perspective.
so that I may be open to this new experience,
or new idea, or someone else's perspective.
Today's lesson for me is about being open to learning. What is your's?
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