How many reminders does it take to get that chore done? As many as it takes. Think back, when you were a child or teen, did you always do the jobs that you were expected to do without reminders? Yes, a few of us were born organized, with a large dose of self-discipline. But this is rare and really goes counter to the development of most kids. They have very different things on their minds. Most of them are not automatically remembering to do that chore before they go on to the next fun activity. That chore is not on their agenda or list, it is on ours!
I have always been willing to give reminders. And because my kids grew up with the ethic of family work, they rarely complained. Sharing the load is part of being in this family. So, they usually got to the chore after a few nudges in that direction. Did they do it "perfectly?" No. But, there too, I really wanted them to learn about family cooperation, not about doing everything the "right" way. And after all, there really are several different ways to fold towels. We just want to be able to put our hands on a clean, dry one when we are wet!
What are the reasons behind our efforts to get kids to do chores? I wanted to share the load, and I wanted to raise sons that knew how to take care of the details of home life. They are grownups now. How effective was my teaching? Not very. My brother-in-law is quoted as saying "What's so big about neat!" when he was a boy of about 8. Well, my sons would probably agree, even today. They didn't seem to catch my desire to have a tidy house. It doesn't matter to them like it does to me, even though they did chores from the time they were very little. But they know what's important to me and they help when I ask.
The bottom line for me is that I like the help! So, I will keep asking. And maybe they will realize the value in doing daily chores when they can find something they need, like a clean, dry towel!
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